I’ve been meaning to post for some time now, but I couldn’t quite find the appropriate time or moment in which I could best captivate my thoughts, and place them into logical format on paper. I guess I’ve been feeling somewhat detached, or perhaps still attached to certain feelings, friendships, and relationships that I can’t possibly predict a likely outcome for.
Although I can excuse my recent absence in the blogging realm with work and school, I can’t help but feel slightly dismayed by the lack of interest and common ground I’ve had in the dating field. I suppose it was my overexposed years in the bar scene, or perhaps a more refined interest in men, but I simply have not been able to commit 100% to anything, or anyone.
If you had asked me 5 years prior what I would be doing 5 years later, I would have rather obviously imagined a marriage to the man I love, with 2 beautiful dogs (much cheaper and than kids), and a vacation home somewhere in the Hamptons. As my Jewish mother ever so consciously reminds me, I am nowhere near my desired destination- and she- nor I, are getting any younger. With nothing to promise her other than my word, I’ve gradually considered rearranging my goals and moving to Canada (What is it about mothers that make us feel as though we’re to blame in the dysfunctional world of dating?).
However, as much as I’d like to displace the blame on the mundane things, I can’t help but consider the inconsistencies infidelities of present day relationships. People today are much more volatile and complacent in their comfort zones. The pressure of long-term goals has slowly faded, and the glitz and glamour of the aesthetic world has taken a front seat. We’ve prioritized temporary needs as a basic standard of survival, and our commitment and loyalties to others have slowly shifted. The variation and welcoming weekend distractions have become acceptable means of short-term resolutions, with little hope and vision to settling down.
Naturally, with the decline and shelf life of relationships on the rise- the criteria for a stable one seems much too far-fetched. People have simply given up on forever, because tonight seems much more promising. Happiness is now delivered through material likes, and real conversations have simply dissolved into the world of texting. Talk of D-list celebrities and night-time “Situations” leave little to no common ground for real world issues. People are more likely to acknowledge the extended Kardashian family, but fail to correctly identify the past four US Presidents. (Remind me again why I’m still paying for school loans?)
I’m not sure if generation glitch, or simply a passing trend. But the obvious shift in our learning curve has left slim to none pickings in the long-term needs of a lasting and meaningful relationship. As much as I try to paint this picture to my mother, I simply cannot make her see the cracks in the wall.
I will say this. I haven’t given up faith just yet. +
